408 Months

Dear Cade and Cole,

Today I turn 408 months old.  Cade, usually I write to you on your monthly birthday . . . that hasn't happened since 12 months (7 months ago!).  Cole, this is all new to you and someday I hope to be more constant with the writing so you both can look back later and know a little bit about how things were for you while you were growing up.  Or maybe it is more for me, so that I remember some of the little things that happened while you both were growing up.

ANYWAY, today I turn 408 months old!  That seems like such a high number.  Does 34 seem lower?  If you had asked me at 24 where I would be in 10 years I would have said that I would be living in St. Louis working for or running my own landscape company, single, enjoying life in a big city.  It was once said of me that I was "sarcastic and single, and probably would be for a long time."  I am none of those things - well maybe still a little sarcastic.  Here I sit in a small town of about 5,000 people, married with two, working for a company doing something I have never educated myself for or really have an interest in other than it allows me to go to work and come home and be completely present when I am at home (something I can't say for any job I have really had).   It is funny really to think that somethings that I never really pictured in my life have come to be, and things that I was working toward have never come to be.  A lot of people look at that as failure, or disappointment that I didn't get what I "wanted", but the reality is I have everything I could ever want - I just didn't know I wanted it.  Now I could never imagine my life any differently - nor do I see myself doing any of those things I thought I would do.  You both and your dad are the best presents I could ever ask for - and I get them every day.

Cade,
You are still growing and changing by huge strides all the time.  You are not just walking - you are running, jumping, and galloping.  You know so many words - and any day now you are going to string them all together and start carrying on conversations with us that we understand.  You are energetic, rough, tough, and LOUD.  The saying "boys are noise with dirt on" really describes you.  You have a very strong opinion about everything, and you have a strong will.  You will need it in your life as you go on to do amazing things.  While I don't always appreciate your strong will, I know it is important for you and for us. 

Cole,
We are still getting to know you.  Like all 3 week olds you pretty much just eat and sleep.  Every once and awhile you wow us by opening your eyes and giving us the best looks.  So far you are pretty laid back.  I will sure miss being around you all day when I have to go back to work in a couple of weeks . . . not really sure what to do about that.

Love, Mom